it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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