I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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