where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
