So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
