Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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