Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Randomize