dude i'm inner monologue high
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
