it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
