And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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