nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
