Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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