I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
