physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Randomize
