So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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