Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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