we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
