Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize