I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Porn is love you can see.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
