Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize