Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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