I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
