i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
