windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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