your parents love me but you hate me
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
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