it wasn't lemon gatorade
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize