fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize