dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
