Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
