Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
