i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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