hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize
