He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
