now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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