i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
be right there i have to get my cape
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
