Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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