first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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