I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
