Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
