420 ftw
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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