dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
