Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Actions speak louder than pants.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
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