Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
there is glitter all over my balls
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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