It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
