Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
