oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize