ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
He told me they were just razor bumps!
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
