My cat gives me a boner
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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