Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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