I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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