She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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