Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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